Life throws you some odd balls sometimes and other times it just knocks you straight off your feet.
A friend who I thought was my friend no longer is. And if I've understood everything so far it is my fault altogether. Why don't I feel guilty? Why don't I feel anguished that I've said such a terrible thing that it would end a friendship? Maybe it is because I don't feel like I've said anything wrong when saying how I felt about the issue. And I have been ratting my head in about it trying to make it all clear so as to understand what was misunderstood or just not heard. But the fact remains I'm one friend short today and the really surprising bit is it feels alright. It is ok. I'm not sad that its over, I've changed quite a bit over the years and I used to be very compliant and bend to some extent to suit others. But I don't want to be a door matt anymore for someone to step all over and use. And ever since I've started to say No there's been friction. Sad really because you should be able to say No without getting branded a Bad Friend and told so ever so often.
What is a Good Friend btw? Is there a course you have to take and pass to be a Good Friend? If so I've missed out completely apparently. Or is being a Good Friend someone who have lots of other friends? What about those like me that only have a few friends that's been there for ages through thick and thin though? Are we outcasts to be despised because we don't know the joy of having a big circle of friends around?
No really, I'm not kidding here, it was told to me I have a weird sense of friendship and that was due to me not having many friends. Period. So you tell me, am I weird?